I don’t just want to write this blog; I want to learn from it. I want to embrace this teaching as I never have before, because I believe it will transform my life and the lives of anyone who applies it. Jesus taught this in His sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5:33-37 (also see James 5:1), where He reminded us not to break our oaths, to fulfill our vows, and to let our yes be yes and our no be no.

Please stop and think for a moment about the time someone broke their word to you. I am sure every one of us can recall a time when someone hurt us by breaking their word. How did you feel when they did that? I am sure you felt hurt or even betrayed. Some relationships might not have recovered from that broken promise. This is one of the impacts of breaking our word and failing to deliver on the promise we made.

The Bible explicitly teaches that a person should keep their oaths and vows, even when doing so is difficult, costly, or painful. This principle is presented as a matter of integrity, faithfulness, and reverence for God. Let’s remind ourselves of some of what God said about keeping oaths.   

  • Numbers 30:1-2 (NIV): “This is what the LORD commands: 2 When a man makes a vow to the LORD or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said”.
  • Deuteronomy 23:23 (NIV): “Whatever your lips utter you must be sure to do, because you made your vow freely to the Lord your God with your own mouth.”
  • Psalm 15:4 (NIV): Describes the righteous person as one who “…keeps an oath even when it hurts, and does not change their mind.” 
  • Ecclesiastes 5:4-5 (NIV): “When you make a vow to God, do not delay to fulfill it. He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your vow. It is better not to make a vow than to make one and not fulfill it.”
  • Proverbs 20:25 (NIV): “It is a trap to dedicate something rashly and only later to consider one’s vows.”

The theme in these scriptures is consistent. Believers should not break their word; whatever we say, we must do. We are to keep our oaths even if it hurts and not change our minds. When we make a promise, we must be quick to fulfill it; if we can deliver on it beforehand, we should!

We see people all around us breaking these simple principles all the time. It has become so commonplace that we are now numb to it, as it has become a normal part of who we are when it shouldn’t.

Let’s look at this using one-liner examples that we often do not honor:

  1. Personal Promises.
    1. “I’ll be there at 5:00 pm.”
    2. “I’ll call you right back” / “I’ll call you over this weekend”.
    3. “I’ll pray for you.”
    4. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”
    5. “I’m on my way!” (When you haven’t left).
  2. Promises to Family & Children
    1. “We’ll go to the park this afternoon.”
    2. “I’ll help you with that project tonight.”
    3. “Just one more TV episode/game, then I will come to bed.”
    4. “Give me 5 minutes, and I will take out the trash.”
  3. Professional & Transactional Promises
    1. “I’ll respond to that email by the close of business today.”
    2. “I’ll send the report by Friday”.
    3. “I’ll pay you back when I get my next paycheck.”
  4. Indirect Promises
    1. Not honoring an RSVP.
    2. “I’ll start my diet/exercise/savings plan on Monday.” Note: One of the worst promises you can break is the one you make to yourself, because it affects your purpose in life and the impact you can make in the lives of others.

To all of the above, I say,“STOP BREAKING YOUR WORD!”

Carrying out what we say builds tremendous credibility and trustworthiness. About 15 years ago, I had a boss and mentor (Mr. Ron Reismeyer) who always kept his word. Once Ron told you he was going to do something, you could bet your last dollar that it would be done on or before the day in question. You did not have to write it down in a notepad or send him a reminder email before it was due. None of that was needed because Mr. Ron Reismeyer honored his word!

If Ron could honor his words and lift the standard around him, how about you and me? Should we not also be standard bearers to the ways outlined by our Heavenly Father and honor our words even if it hurts and costs us something? We need to be reflections of our God, and He operates as follows:

Numbers 23:19, “God is not human, that he should lie,  not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?”

About a year ago, I was sending in my monthly reports late, and my boss was patient with me until one day he said, “Dane, as a Christian, you should be honoring your word.” Well, my friend, his words cut me like a knife. I took that so personally because it spoke to my Godly character, as I was not representing kingdom principles. I could have told him that the department’s workload is immense and that more staff are needed, but none of that mattered.  What mattered was me pushing past those departmental constraints/challenges and honoring my word even though it hurt (i.e., working longer hours to complete the report).

My boss, Sieunarine, called me to remembrance, and I made positive changes. I am doing the same for us today by penning this blog so that all our consciences may be stirred to apply a higher criterion when making promises.

Our identity must be anchored in the image of God (Genesis 1:27), who always keeps His promises (Numbers 23:19; 2 Corinthians 1:20). Therefore, let’s raise the standard for honoring our word and for how we present our integrity, not as a personal project or a check-the-box exercise, but as a reflection of God’s character that must flow from us.

I close by providing some pointers on how we can keep our word.

  1. Pause and think about what you are going to promise.
    1. Can I really do what they are asking? Do I have the time, energy, resources, or skills to do this?
    2. Am I going to commit 100% to this?
    3. Am I saying “yes” out of guilt, people-pleasing, or genuine willingness?
    4. Instead of rushing to say yes, say “let me check and get back to you,” then get back to the person as promised.
  2. Set calendar reminders to notify you of upcoming events you have committed to.
  3. Don’t try to be a Superman/Superwoman and take on too much in life. If you try to do everything, then sometimes nothing gets done.
  4. Embrace the Power of “No, “A loving, honest “no” is infinitely better than a dishonest “yes” that leads to a broken promise.
  5. Have a strong desire to live uprightly and be a person of integrity.

PS: Dane Miller was last seen praying and asking the Holy Spirit to help him keep his promises, even though they hurt.

Your Brother in the Lord,

Dane Miller – “God is the Author, I am the Pen”

Authored Book – What is the Woman Saying – Lessons from Biblical Women.

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